


Making up the Reasons

by trekkielibrarian



Series: To the Moon and Back [2]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Bookish dates, Bookstores, F/M, Flirting, Friendship, Holodecks/Holosuites, Lake Como, Sailing, afternoon getaway that are not at all romantic but really are, bookworms, just friends....or are we
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26279095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trekkielibrarian/pseuds/trekkielibrarian
Summary: Set just before Darkling, Tom, B'Elanna, Harry and some crewmates enjoy an afternoon on the holodeck.
Relationships: Harry Kim & Tom Paris & B'Elanna Torres, Tom Paris/B'Elanna Torres
Series: To the Moon and Back [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1896376
Comments: 18
Kudos: 18





	1. Chapter 1

B’Elanna looked at her white floral dress and debated yet again about if she should change or not. She’d worn it recently to the luau and he had said she looked “smashing.” Just remembering his look when he saw her made her heart flutter. Would it seem like she was trying too hard and he would remember that he had liked her in this dress and that she had remembered that? Or would it look like she was being casual and not putting too much effort and thought into her outfit? She’d worn it once before, so that wasn’t too much effort, right? No, she should change….

The door chime chirped and she missed her chance to change. Resigning to stick with the dress and hoping he wouldn’t remember it, she answered the door. 

“Hey, B’Elanna. Ready to go? Lyndsey and Chell are already there.” Harry Kim was waiting at her door. They were joining few others for an afternoon on the holodeck for one of Tom’s sailing programs he promised would be fun. Sailing wasn’t her first choice, she’d rather just relax on the beach with some synthetic sun and book in hand, but she hoped there’d be some time for that too.

As Harry and B’Elanna made their way to the turbolift they chatted about Neelix's latest lunch creation and other ship small talk. Once inside the turbolift, Harry cautiously broached a change of topic.

“You seem happy,” Harry started. “It’s good to see you two back together.” 

B’Elanna paused for a moment and started to object. She knew exactly who he was talking about and she was not going to admit there was anything between her and Tom, but Harry stopped her.

“Don’t worry-I just mean friends. But you two work well with each other. Sure you might bicker and fight, but you push each other and bring out good in each other. You challenge each other in a good way."

Yes, Tom Paris seemed to bring out a fight in her, but that maybe that fight was something good? She hadn’t considered that. 

“You make him happy,” Harry continued. “He’s ridiculous around you, you know.” 

“I don’t know about that,” she scoffed. “He’s Tom Paris. He’s ridiculously charming around every female.” 

“I don't mean charm, B'Elanna. It's different. _You’re_ different.”

The turbolift stopped and promptly ended the conversation and leaving B’Elanna to ponder exactly what Harry was implying. She and Tom flirted, they fought, and there wasn’t anything more there. Tom was a flirtatious fly boy who would never settle down and there was no way he could handle B’Elanna’s Klingon side. It was better if they just stayed at distance. But she couldn’t stop the small nagging thought in the back of her mind that kept wondering but what if?


	2. Chapter 2

Tom looked up and smiled as B’Elanna and Harry walked in. He was putting the finishing touches on the boat and Lyndsey was getting snacks and drinks ready. B’Elanna was wearing that white floral dress from the luau and he loved the way she looked in it. Did she remember that? Was she wearing it on purpose? Surely she couldn’t remember the way he had looked at her then. 

“We’re all set!” Lyndsey called out. Tom and Harry were already on the boat and B’Elanna was looking at it like she wasn’t sure she trusted being out on the water. 

“I don’t know, I think I’ll stay here and read and wait for you to get back,” she said, starting to back away. 

Tom jumped off the edge with a quick leap and softly touched her arm. “Oh no you don’t. Sailing is the perfect getaway and I know you’ll like it. Trust me.” He smiled what he hoped was his most charming smile and she brought her dark eyes up to his, challenging him with a look that said ‘you think you know what I like?’ He wanted to take her in his arms right then and show her that yes, he could figure out exactly what she liked, but people were watching and he knew if he did he would be ruining whatever was hopefully brewing between them. 

“Come on,” Tom pulled her hand gently toward the boat and they both climbed on. “Chell and Vorik decided to back out. Vorik tried to claim that even holographic sailing made him seasick and I couldn’t argue with him that was not at all logical.”

“Chell was a lost cause the moment he saw the gourmet snack shop,” Lyndsey added. “He has some idea about trying out some new fancy soup.”

“I’d considered anything without pleeka rind in it to be fancy. It’s all Neelix has been serving lately,” Harry laughed. 

“Oh you poor thing,” Lyndsey patted Harry’s arm and pretended to pout. “That must be so terrible for you to endure. Next time we have the same lunch, I’ll loan you some replicator rations.” 

If Tom didn’t know Harry better, he would think that Harry’s checks began to blush because he was smitten. But Harry blushed anytime anyone said or did something kind for him, it couldn’t be because he was interested in Ensign Ballard. Or if he was, he was hopeless. He always fell for the unattainable women. Tom chuckled silently to himself and looked at his own unattainable woman, hoping she wouldn’t be unreachable for much longer. 

*****


	3. Chapter 3

B’Elanna had expected more of them for this outing instead of it seeming like a double date. But it wasn’t unusual for crew members to join up for a holodeck outing but then go separate ways. With limited holodeck time for the crew, having open program times and shared programs gave more chances for entertainment and escape.

Even though Lindsey Ballard worked in engineering and was a friend of Harry’s, B’Elanna hadn’t spent much time with her. But Lindsey turned out to be funny and knew how to keep the conversation easy and light. Once they set off, the holographic lake was calm and peaceful. The scenery surrounding the area was full of beautiful mountains, greenery, and colorful buildings stacked on top of each other. Tom had mentioned this program to her a few months ago, not long after he had created it.

If you ever have a free evening, I have a holodeck program you might enjoy. Sailing on Lake Como?

She had brushed him off, but this time around there were more than the two of them and it seemed safer to join him. This was a friendly outing as a group, not a date.

She had to admit he had been right about the program, but she wasn’t about to give him the satisfaction of knowing that. Tom was great at sailing, which surprised her a bit and she wasn’t sure exactly why. Maybe not surprised exactly, but irritated her just a tiny bit-why was he so damn good at everything he did?

“So when did you learn to sail, fly boy?” B’Elanna asked, stretching out on the seat of the sailboat and leaning back to let the sun warm her.

“I’ve always loved the sea. When I was a kid I was fascinated with boats and water and would always take a boat out at my grandmother’s lake house,” Tom started, smiling at the memory. “Sailing was the one thing my father knew nothing about it, which I’m sure helped my interest. I wanted to be good at something that he wasn't. But as soon as I was old enough, he was taking me up in shuttles and sailing fell by the wayside. I actually had thought about joining the Federation Naval Patrol, but that was deemed not up to standard for a Paris by my father and it was Starfleet instead.” Tom shrugged a bit and bent to pick up a drink from the picnic basket. “I guess it wasn’t all bad though. Flying got me here at least.”

"With a detour to a penal colony,” Harry laughed.

Tom just rolled his eyes and ignored the jab. “You know, there’s not much I miss about home.” Harry started to protest but Tom stopped him. Everyone knew he was the most homesick of everyone. “Ok, ok, maybe some of the beaches and the food, but not the people. The crew of Voyager have become more family to me than my own family ever was.”

B’Elanna thought about this. The crew of Voyager had become close over the past three years, closer than she ever thought a Starfleet and Maquis crew would be when they first got pulled into the Delta Quadrant. They actually blended well and the dynamic worked. They had become one crew.

“I think you're right, Tom. Voyager has become a family over the past three years in a way I never thought possible.”

Tom looked at her then, his blue eyes penetrating deep into her soul. “There’s more for me here on Voyager than there ever has been on Earth,” he said softly. She felt her breath catch a bit.

They sat still a moment, not sure what to say or do next and then Lyndsey broke the silence. “How about we break open those snacks! I’ve got cheese, crackers, grapes,” she started as she and Harry began doling out plates, food, and wine.

As Tom handed B’Elanna a glass of wine, their fingers brushed lightly. B’Elanna felt that spark again and they looked at each other. In that moment they smiled and something, she wasn’t sure exactly what it was, passed between them. An understanding, a moment of agreement, a nod to the fact that they could be something more, she wasn’t sure. But in that moment she was willing to find out.


	4. Chapter 4

She felt giddy from the trip, the wine, the joking conversation. She had to admit she had fun. As Tom navigated the boat into the dock, Lyndsey pointed out to Harry they still had some time left. “There’s a villa I read about that I really want to see,” Lyndsey tugged on Harry’s hand, leading him off the boat. “Come with me!” 

“You know I can’t wouldn’t deny you anything,” Harry said sincerely, but Lyndsey just rolled her eyes at him. 

“Stop being so dramatic. We’ll see you two later!” she called and they were off, leaving Tom and B’Elanna alone. 

Tom finished checking that everything with the boat was secure and stepped onto the dock, then turned to offer B’Elanna his hand. She just glared at him and stepped off, but wobbled a bit, much to her irritation. “Whoa, watch your footing, there’s ropes there,” Tom’s strong arms steadied her and she pushed off him quickly, brushing her skirt down and stiffening. 

“Well, thanks, I’ll see you later, Lieutenant.” She started to turn and walk away.

“B’Elanna, wait!” Tom came after her and stepped in front of her. "Uhhh....." he looked at his feet, then back up at her a bit shyly. "There’s this great bookstore not too far from here, it’s in this gorgeous old building, it's in the middle of this amazing plaza, there's so much historical detail, and it’s just so cozy and warm,” he was rambling, which was unlike him. He paused and took her hand. “Come with me?” 

She felt the warmth of his hand and nodded. He let go and she walked next to him down the small streets, taking in the colorful buildings and shops. There were people mingling about, eating at outdoor cafes, flowers overflowing from balconies, and awnings advertising a variety of goods and services. The sunlight was dimming and lights were turning on around them, strung from building to building. They came upon a brick façade, tucked back from the street a bit. It wasn’t anything spectacular from the outside and if you blinked, you might miss the full size windows sharing a peek inside. There were vendor booths selling food outside and blocking the front and small tables surrounded the entryway. The second and third floors had small windows with bluish-grey shutters that looked unremarkable and the door was so small you almost missed it. The storefront was lit up with a purplish glow and gave off a warm and inviting vibe.

“Here we are, Libreria Ubik. It’s magical once you step inside.”

Tom was right. The moment they stepped through the doorway, they were surrounded by a feeling of something special. The smell of print books filled the air, displays of books piled on tables everywhere you could see, walls lined with books. A stone archway stood halfway through the store and tables surrounded it packed with books, bookmarks, small gifts, cards, tea, toys, everything you could imagine. Everywhere you looked more piles and displays appeared and there was a staircase near the back leading to more floors above. Three glorious floors of unending books as far as the eye could see.

“Wow,” B’Elanna sighed. 

“Yeah,” Tom agreed. “Sometimes I just like the feel and smell of an actual book in my hands. I don’t have room in my quarters for as many books as I’d like, so I have to settle for PADDs and the occasional book I can replicate or steal away from the holodeck.” 

“I didn’t know you liked to read so much,” B’Elanna admitted. 

“I’ve always been a reader. I would hide away in my room as a kid and get lost in a book. It was better than being given another Admiral Paris lecture. My father could turn anything into a lesson. Books were safer.”

B’Elanna nodded. She shared the sentiment. “I would escape to the library on Kessik. It was a place I could go that was away from my parents fighting and be alone. The librarians never treated me any differently and I could stay there reading for hours.”

They wandered the aisles slowly, taking their time as true booklovers do, glancing at each cover, picking up the ones that catch their eye, reading a bit, feeling the softness and sturdiness of each cover. They walked together in contemplative silence, respecting each other’s space to look and wander and browse. 

“It might sound strange,” B’Elanna started after some time, “sometimes I feel like books sing to me. The right book just calls out to me at the right time and it’s like it knew I needed it in that moment.” 

“No, that doesn’t sound strange at all. I feel the same way.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. When I was a kid, I craved adventure. But I was a nervous kid, kind of shy, and I had a big family legacy to live up to. It was a lot of pressure. One day I was browsing through my grandfather’s library and came across Jules Verne, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. It was a hefty book for a seven-year-old and my father didn’t think I would actually read it, so of course, I had to prove him wrong. It was a lot, but I was enthralled with it and I couldn’t put it down. My mother helped me with it too and I kept going back to it when I was older. It’s still one of my favorites and I pick it up when I need something comforting and familiar.”

“I never read it. I’m familiar with it though. My Uncle would tell us stories on our camping trips and some of his favorites came from trying to convince us the tales in that book were real. He always loved to exaggerate.” B’Elanna smiled at the memory and Tom looked at her with a glint of mischief in his eyes.

“Come with me.” Tom reached for her hand and she let him take it and he pulled through the maze of the store. He seemed to be rushing with excitement as he walked to the science fiction area and ran his fingers across the book spines looking for the right one. “Ah, here it is.” He pulled a book off the shelf and then motioned for B’Elanna to follow him. They made their way to the wooden staircase and he led her up to a small reading loft, perfectly cozy with oversized chairs, just big enough for two people to sit huddled together with a small amount of space between them. Tom sat in the chair and after a moment of hesitation, B’Elanna took a seat. She settled in, feeling a bit stiff and uncomfortable, but then Tom opened the pages and began to read aloud to her. 

_“The year 1866 was signalized by a remarkable incident, a mysterious and puzzling phenomenon,”_ he read and she felt herself relax. His voice was soothing and she found herself being pulled into the story. He was a great reader and she hadn’t been read aloud to in ages. 

“I don’t know the last time someone read to me,” B’Elanna said, smiling a bit.

Tom laughed. “My mom always said you’re never too old to be read to. My father would argue that we were old enough to read on our own, but she insisted on family read alouds. It was the one thing she put her foot down and stood up to my father about. So family read alouds it was. As much as he protested, I think my father actually enjoyed it. Every night, even when we were older and my sisters moved out. Anytime we got together, my mother made sure we were read to. ”

“That sounds lovely.”

“It seemed silly at the time, but once I went to the Academy, I found that I actually kind of missed it. It’s nice to have someone to share a book with.”

“Hmm….” An idea had struck B’Elanna. She stood up and pulled Tom out of the chair. “Ok, it’s your turn. Come on.” She nearly bounded down the stairs and headed to the children’s section. She bounced on her toes as she browsed the shelves, clearly full of excitement of being reunited with an old friend. 

“Here,” she said, practically shoving a book into Tom’s hands. The book had silhouettes and red and yellow circles splashed across the front, along with a big shiny gold medal Tom recognized as the Newbery Medal. “A Wrinkle in Time. One of my childhood favorites. I think I related to Meg as a child. She felt alone and different and she comes from a family of scientists.” 

She was gushing and she knew it, but she couldn’t stop. Once she got started talking about something she was passionate about, it was hard to reign in her excitement. “It’s all about dark and light, good versus evil and there’s a whole series. I devoured them multiple times and the librarian finally gave me my own copy after I had checked it out over and over for a year straight. It was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me.” She stopped, memories overcoming her of how much she had escaped into the world of Meg Murray and her adventures, wishing she could find a place to belong like Meg, to find friends and family, and even love.

“And I think I always wanted a Calvin O’Keefe of my own. He’s so caring and kind and he can handle Meg and.....” she stopped, looking at Tom’s wide-eyed expression. “I’m talking too much.”

“No, no, not at all. I like it. I like seeing your passion. This series clearly means a lot to you.” He gave over his copy of 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. “I’ll read it but you try this one. I know you’ll like it.”

B’Elanna smiled, almost laughing. 

“Oh really? What makes you sure?” She stepped a bit closer to him, teasingly. “I’m not sure this is a fair trade. . And it's an old adventure story, I'm not sure it's really my first choice of escapist reading.” 

“What?” Tom pretended to be offended. "It's the perfect escapist reading!"

"Your book is a lot bigger than mine," she countered. 

“It is not! Plus, this is a classic.”

“So is this one,” she challenged. She grabbed the book from his hands and held them up together, comparing them. “Yours is at least 100 pages longer. That’s not fair. Plus it’s older and has a lot of old language.”

“Yours is part of a series.”

“So? They’re all good! It's worth it.”

“Well, we seem to be at an impasse,” Tom quipped, a taunting glint in his eyes. 

“I guess so.” She pursed her lips. She was enjoying this back and forth. She could banter with him like this for days. It excited her and energized her. 

“Alright Lieutenant,” he started, stepping closer and leaning in a bit, his steps causing her to step backwards into the shelf behind her. “We’ll make a compromise. We’ll read them together. Our own book club. You and me, reading aloud, sharing our favorite stories.” 

He reached for both books, taking them from her hands and setting them on each side of her as she leaned back into the shelf. 

She couldn’t help but stop breathing for just a moment. His blue eyes twinkled with delight and trepidation and maybe even desire? Her heart was pounding, he was so close she could feel heat rising off of him, his breath near her face. Why did she keep making up reasons to avoid him and not be with him? This, right here with him, was what she wanted. Couldn’t she let herself admit that and open herself up to something more, something she wanted and hoped he would want too? 

She took a deep breath and steadied herself. Her lips turned up in a smirk. 

“You’re on.” She stepped beneath his arm and away from his closeness, enjoying this dance. He started to step back and almost leaped with his giddiness that he had convinced her. He was so cute when he thought he’d won.

“But,” she turned back, yanking the books from his hands, and forcing him to step back into the shelf, swapping the positions they were just in, “we start with mine.”

**Author's Note:**

> Maybe I injected a bit of me into this one, but I think both Tom and B'Elanna are some of the biggest booknerds. 
> 
> Quote from 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, work is in public domain
> 
> Libreria Ubik Como is a real place but I took some liberties with the descriptions and placement of things, mostly used for inspiration.


End file.
